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Am I Alone?

Photo by Sarah Crutchfield
I never hear anyone within my circle talking about these things. Do regular people have this much down time too? No one probably wants to hear about my problems anyway. Faith it until you make it. How long will this mask hold? Can’t make them see me cry, keep smiling, act like you’re not a thousand screaming people inside.
These are just a few examples of the thoughts that may flood through our minds from time to time. One of the loneliest things in the world is going through a particular circumstance in your life and feeling as though you are alone here, that no one can relate to your depressive thoughts, and seemingly irrational fears. 
Depression is one of the biggest liars you can ever come across. Depression tells you that your story is unimportant. Depression tells you to keep your thoughts to yourself. Depression tells you to wallow in self-pity. Depression tells you that no one cares. It eats away at your self-esteem and darkens your overall outlook on life. You no longer feel enthusiastic about the things that gave you life. You begin to find yourself on the path of disillusionment. And because you’ve grown up in a culture where things like this aren’t necessarily verbalized you begin to see it as a non-issue, until one day you realize that all you seem to do is find dark clouds to fill your sky with. 
What I want to say to you friend, is that depression is not a respecter of persons. It can happen to best of us. The happiest of us. The strongest of us. The kindest of us. But it doesn’t have to win. You move into the direction of victory when you realise that your story, no matter how mundane or small, is important.
Speak your truth even if your voice shakes – Maggie Kuhn.
At first, coming to terms with your depression may seem near impossible to do. But that’s the first step towards victory, not wishing it away, not filling up yourself with motivational quotes you find online or in self-help books. It comes with taking a good look at yourself in the mirror and understanding that this is real, but it doesn’t have to always to be your life. With every issue that pertains to depression or anxiety the underlying factor(s) almost always seem(s) to be with the adopting of destructive habit(s) or mind-set. By taking these issues head on we begin on our path to healing. Sometimes the help of a professional is also needed with extreme cases. But this is a small thing you can do.
Before your story inspires or helps someone else it must first inspire and help you. Look back on the days you felt most down and defeated. Now look at your present self and realize as bad as those days were they did not kill you. They did not break you beyond repair. 
You are still here. Still breathing.
Keep fighting, the battle is almost won.
Written by,
Ronnel Nurse

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